'...I thank God every time I remember you...It's not at all fanciful for me to think this way about you. My prayers and hopes have deep roots inreality. You have, after all, stuck with me all the way...All along you have experienced with me the most generous help from God. He knows how much I LOVE and MISSyou these days. Sometimes I think I feel as strongly about you as Christ does!'
' "Abba, Father," he said, "everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not my will, but what you will." '
The NIV. Mark 14 v 36.
' "Papa, Father, you can - can't you? - get me out of this. Take this cup away from me. But please, not what I want - what do you want?" '
The Message. Mark 14 v 36.
Recently I have seemed to be going through so much, which always seems to be frustrating and challenging rather than good. I started to read this book called 'God on Mute' by Pete Greig and it has spoken so clearly to me and has laid down some very important factors. The book is written about unanswered prayer. I guess through all of my challenges I have seen where God has not answered my pleading prayers. To some extent I now realise why. This doesn't necessarily make it easier, but it does help me make some sense of it all, which brings some comfort.
From the bible verse I have written above we can see Jesus coming before God, coming before his father in the most intimate way - he calls him Abba which is Aramaic for father - Jesus' own language. Jesus comes before his Abba and asks him to take away his pain, acknowledging that it is possible for Him to end this, but he also asks Abba to have His own way, acknowledging that maybe God's will is different to his own. Jesus knows God for who He is and knows that in all things He is the Almighty One possible of doing anything, but that He is also the Almighty One who chooses to do what is best.
In the book Pete talks about us coming before God knowing that He is possible to do what we ask but knowing at the same time that what we ask is not always the best. Pete talks about us coming before God with our pain whilst allowing God to have His own way, the way that will bring the most glory. Sometimes we have to go against our own desires in order to glorify God mightily. Wow, what a thought!! We can humble ourselves and our needs in our most vulnerable and painful times in order to expose Gods glory.
Reading this has made me change my tune about my present sufferings (which in comparison to most are not really sufferings at all). Life is not made to be easy. We must embrace life for what it is, the good and the not so good. We must be willing to sacrifice all for Gods glory. How amazing would it be to know that in our darkest moments God was being glorified in the most extraordinary way?!
Suffering is hard and God longs to hear our hurt and our anger and our pain in these times...but suffering can sometimes bring the most glory. Be released in knowing that you are honouring Him through all of this!!
'There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear.' 1 John 4 v 18.
Emily, Soul Sista Conference Day: 'Relationships enrich your life, they don't define it.'
Grays Anatomy: 'Don't chase me unless you're ready to catch me.'
The Notebook: 'The best kind of love is the type that weakens the soul and leaves you reaching for more...it plants a fire in your heart and a peace in your mind.'
Viola De Lesseps (Shakespeare in Love): 'I will have poetry in my life. And adventure. And love. Love above all. No...not the artful postures of love, not playful and poetical games of love for the amusement of an evening, but love that...over-throws life. Unbiddable, ungovernable - like a riot in the heart, and nothing to be done, come ruin or rapture. Love - like there has never been in a play.'
Ren and Ariel (Footloose): 'I'll sing to you of silver swans, of kingdoms and carillons. I'll sing of bodies interwined, underneath an innocent sky.'
Ice Princess: 'Passion makes people go on to do exceptional things.'
One Tree Hill: 'People love a guy who rises from the ashes.'
Timo Cruz (Coach Carter): 'Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve this world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.'
Bob Marley: 'The people that are trying to make the world worse never take a day off, why should I? Light up the darkness.'
A Walk To Remember: 'Take a risk, dare to move, love is a leap of faith. When your heart says yes but the world says no, don’t let anyone stand in your way.'
Perfume advert: 'A life without passion is unforgivable.'
Helmany: 'Culture is the lens through which we see the world.'
'...Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration - what a creation! ... Your thoughts - how rare, how beautiful!' Psalm 139 v 13 - 17 The Message.
TV Programme: 'Open your heart. Be brave. Be true. You will see it in his eyes.'
C S Lewis: 'The beauty of the female is the root of joy to the female as well as to the male...to desire the enjoying of her own beauty is the obedience of Eve, and to both it is in the lover that the beloved tastes of her own delightfulness.'
'Let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.' 1 John 3 v 18.
Mother Teresa: 'A joyful heart is the inevitable result of a heart burning with love.'
Amy Bloom: 'Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and choice of partner.'
Crazy/Beautiful: 'When it's real, when it's right, don't let anything stand in your way.'
Okay, so I have another video for you guys. I put Kiss 100 on the music channels to play the other day and there was this song playing, the lyrics really stood out to me. Here are some of the lyrics:
Mary J Blige
Just Fine
'So I like what I see when I’m looking at me
When I’m walking past the mirror
Don't stress through the night, at a time in my life
Ain’t worried about if you feel it
Got my head on straight, I got my vibe right
I aint gonna let you kill it
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just…..
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just fine
Feels so good, when you’re doing all the things that you want to do
Get the best out of life, treat yourself to something new
Keep your head up high
In yourself, believe in you, believe in me
Having a really good time, I’m not complaining
And I’m a still wear a smile if it's raining
I got to enjoy myself regardless
I appreciate life, I’m so glad that it's fine
So I like what I see when I'm looking at me
When I’m walking past the mirror
Aint worried about you and what you gonna do
I’m a lady so I must stay classy
Got to keep it hot, keep it together
If I want to get better
See I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just…..
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
See I won’t change my life, my life’s just fine
I ain't gon’ let nothing get in my way
(I ain't gon' let nobody bring me down, no, no, no)
No matter what nobody has to say
(No way, no way, no way)
I ain’t gon’ let nothing get in my way
No matter what nobody has to say.'
I just love what she has to say about life and how we shouldn't let anyone get in our way. I love that she declares that she likes what she sees when she walks past the mirror - how many of us can say that?? I love how she says we should do what we love, get the best out of life and wear a smile even when it's raining. How many of us actually smile when things aren't all fine around us?? How many of us ignore what others say and just live our own life??
I think there is a lesson, or maybe several lessons, to be learnt through this song. Things are never going to be great all the time, that is life. We are going to have challenging times and even completely horrific times. We are all going to get disappointed and ripped apart by others. We are all going to dislike ourselves...but are these all reasons for giving up on everything?? For giving up on our life which is probably actually 'just fine'??
At the moment I seem to be going through challenge after challenge, ever since I started college actually. I feel like I have just had this consistency of struggles. Sunshine seems to peek out at times but not for long. The rain comes in pretty quick and pretty heavy, but I'm not about to declare that that's it, my life isn't worth it anymore, because I know that my life is actually 'just fine'. Yes, I am also not about to say that's all my life is going to be either. I don't want a life that is 'just fine' but I'd rather it be 'just fine' than damn right awful. I know that in all my challenges and struggles I am being grown and strengthened for the next thing. I know that it is in Him that I find my strength and my trust and my life. I know that through all this He is having His will, which means my life will be much more than 'just fine'....incredible, amazing, extraordinary even.
Maybe your life isn't as you wished it would be or what you hoped it would be at this time but maybe there is a lesson to be learnt?? Maybe this is strengthening you for the next season of your life?? Maybe this time is the lesson before success??
We are all called to live incredible, amazing and extraordinary lives...we are all called to shine.
Timo Cruz
Coach Carter
'Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve this world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.'
Where is our identity found?? Everybody has an identity whether they realise it or not. When we are born we have the right to be given a name, a date of birth and a place of birth, as a way of giving us some sort of identity. Even before birth we may have an identity, after all, doesn't God state that he knew us before we were even conceived?!
'....My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.' Psalm 139 v 15-16 NIV.
The reason I've put these pictures up is because I thought they mixed with the topic quite well. Sunday before Christmas we had a fancy dress party at church for all the young people, as part of our Christmas celebrations. It was really fun and nearly every person was dressed differently. It was a night of dressing as someone different to ourselves, a time when we could step into the shoes of someone with a different identity and yes, it was fun but also it was just pretend and everybody knew that. It was just for the sake of making a normal party slightly different and more entertaining.
It was for nothing more than fun but that's not true for everyone is it?! I know that everyone goes through phases of finding themselves...learning who we are and what it is we wish to do with our own lives, but this time can be confusing and hard and also full of pressure from those around us. I know that I have only truly discovered who I am since I have left school...since I have come away from the peer pressure that school brings and since I have only carried out things that I have chosen to carry out myself.
If we all look at our lives I'm sure we can see where we have once taken on a different identity to our own..maybe now, maybe in the past, but it doesn't have to be like that. I came to learn that my identity is not in the things of the world, but in the things of the world I am working towards - my identity is in God and who He says I am. When I was at school I was so caught up with trying to have the newest, most fashionable clothes and having some hot guy think the same of me that I forgot the important things. I forgot that none of these things bring consistent and complete happiness. I forgot that these things didn't have to determine who I say I am and what I think of myself. I forgot that people know no different to what the world says brings happiness but that doesn't have to be the case.
Once I remembered God's promises over my life and that I live to serve Him and no other, I became myself. I stood once again in my own identity...created for me before time even began. I guess there is a time before this period of discovering who we are when we actually live in our own identity - when we are children. Yes, we don't tend to look to the future and what we wish to achieve so much, but when we are children we are not pressurised by others so much...we are content as ourselves. We are who we are and there is no questionning. All comes down to believing God as children do, doesn't it?! Having the faith and vulnerability of a child?!
'They will sparkle in his land like jewels in a crown. How attractive and beautiful they will be!...Then how they'll shine! shimmer! glow! the young men robust, the young women lovely!' Zechariah 9 v 16-17 NIV and The Message (emphasis added).
Okay, so what is family exactly and should it be one of the most important things in your life?? I heard a quote once that said something like the family you come from isn't as important as the family you'll have.
For me, I completely agree with this. Over the last week or so especially, I have been recognising the need for a new family, for the family that will one day be called mine, instead of my parents.
I am home for the Christmas holidays and life is tuff at home with my parents and siblings. I love them to bits and I love spending time with them, but the time has come when I truly need to spread my wings and fly away. I have lived away from home for nearly two years now and there are times when I am truly homesick but now I realise it is not home that I long for, it is the companionship I receive from being with those that have known me from the beginning. It is the love that always lasts even when I'm in my foulest and most emotional moods. It is the familiarity of being with those that I know I can completely be myself with.
I miss people but not home itself. I miss my parents and my sisters and my brother but I don't miss my parents family. I realise, I kinda miss what I haven't yet lived...I miss, or rather, I long for, MY family...mine and Pauls family!!
Family can't come until you know yourself though, know who you are and what you are called to be. I think it's important and even crucial to have a time where you are by yourself, in order to truly find yourself and learn and develop who you are and who you are in Christ. After all, how can you find your true self and your true calling when you are caught up with another person?! Yes, this time probably means being single but why shouldn't that be embraced?! If we embrace this time, we learn to build a firm foundation for our future, for life. We become strong in who we are and what we desire and we become strong in Christ. It is then that we can embrace family, embrace life with another. The foundation is built so the family stays strong and lasts. After all, shouldn't family be forever, just as marriage is?!
Family is exciting and the family that we will one day create I believe is more important than the family we are already a part of, our parents family. Without this family that isn't called our own, where we are imparted into, where we are grown and where we learn things for the family we will one day have, we are nothing...this family is important but it's not the end!!
As the first day of 2008 comes to a close, I pray that this year people will embrace their circumstances - whether they are single or not, whether they are still living in their parents family or have already started creating their own, so they may be blessed and strengthened and encouraged. May you embrace family for what it is and everyday live for your family...to remain strong and therefore FOREVER.
